What i needed to say

I just wanted to tell you..

i wanted to tell you,
you light up my world
it glistens in the sun like
fresh fallen snow. Because
of YOU i am alive today.
your tree of love for me
grows everyday, my
challanges in life are
guided by your smile.
Your voice can be harsh like
a drill sargent in the army
waterfalls of tears flow from
my face from time to time
when i hear that drill sargent
But the warm fuzzy teddy bear
underneath is always there for a
GIANT bear hug i just wanted
to say
TH
AN
KS
Dad

So i wrote this last night after a fight with my dad..ha i know it isnt very good so i want your help!

*what can i do to add more detail?
*should i make it longer? if yes how so?
*what do you think of it? and be honest!